Hash Trash: To all who read these presents greetings, THIS IS HASH TRASH!!!
Yesterday evening was the 19th Anal *unning of the Sembach H3 Winter Solstice Hash *un which some of you wankers missed, skipped, were unaware of, etc, et al, ad nauseum. WTF!!! We’ll get to you later…maybe.
To all of you who showed up in usual Sembach style…I applaud you. You took a chance. A slim chance at having a great, dry , eventful evening in a shite li’l town like Erdesbach (they have KUS plates), and your gamble totally paid off. The Winter Solstice *un went off without a hitch once we finally found the goddamn On-start.
Let’s start at the beginning. We all sat there on our respective couches contemplating whether to go as if our individual absences would go unnoticed. We didn’t want to go out in the pouring rain only to be possibly accosted by Krampus in the deep dark woods. But you, and I….we all did. And now we are all better off because of it.
It did not rain on this trail. Furthermore, it was the warmest soltice evening in recent memory. We had a great (almost) full moon lighting the trail allmost the entire time. The trail was short. Finally, nobody died. JACKPOT!!!
The pack toted our Virgin, Just Lawrence, on a 2-3km sloppy mess lit by chem lights and romantic moonlight around TP’s house and ended on his porch where we were served both white & red gluhwein and cookies. Krampus made a visit and harassed some of the harriettes, I licked a belly botton (hey, a bet’s a bet) and Sensual Predator was picked on repeatedly both as the offender and as a stunt liver of Vader.
We have adjourned and moved on but WAIT…some of you weren’t on trail with us. That means that you should attempt to redeem yourselves by cumming to tonight’s Full Moon trail hared by Squeaky Queen and Tequila Sundown in Hoheneken at 1400. The weather forecast looks good, Squeaky lays an awesome trail, Tequila is assisting, today is the actual solstice (thanks, TP) and I’ll bring BEER!
Sincerely a douche nozzle,
Putin My Sister
WHEN: Fri, 21 December
WHY: Friday is the winter solstice! Duh!
TIME: 1930/7:30 PM – hare away at 1945 sharp!
COST: $5/5 euro
TRAIL : A – B+. Enjoy TP’s shortest trail ever on the shortest day of the year.
HARE: Teacher’s Pet
Bring: Your sexy Bellybuttons, warm clothes for later or no clothes at all, pagan clothes and any weird pagan-fu you want to bring with you; a lighting device.
Featuring: SNOW! Ok ok more likely rain… Cold — most certainly. True trail will probably have a little of the old up and down. Pretty lights of the little town of Erdesbach. Yule log, frozen boar turds, Beer stop, gluhwein stop, assorted other tomfoolery, solstice shenanigans, posh circle and a nice little on-after at Haus of Tp and BooBoo
Point your GPS device here:
See You there!
“Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial”