When 21 Oct 2017 @1400 (2pm wanks)
How: Don’t care, drive your car, carpool, *un, walk
Bring: $5 or 5 Euro, Warm clothes, a thirst for beer, and of course VIRGINS!!!
Where: Morlauterer Straße 99, 67659 Kaiserslautern, Deutschland
Hares: Loveballs and First Glass Ride
Starting point: big parking lot south of swimming pool Waschmühle
Hares´note: I will be flat and dry and no shiggy… promise!… so get prepared…
Hear ye, hear ye, happy trails to all who read this Hash Trash missive for Sembach Hash #965!
The pack arrived to a beautiful October day in Germany, with temperatures in the mid-60s and the occasional rain shower. Yet 20 people made it to #965, proving once again that beer is thicker than water. Notably, FIVE WHOLE VIRGINS were present, as well as a similar amount of visitors (some of whom have yet to be abducted!)
Our hares, Loveballs and First Glass Ride, promised a short, shiggy-free trail and our RA Lego took them at their word. The boy is cute, but too trusting, and the hares took full advantage of this. More on that later.
The trail was a wonderful shiggy affair for about a kilometer, straight through brambles (or was that just me?) up the hill to the Adventure Quest. The quest was to slay a nightmarish monster called the Appletini, and I am glad to say we succeeded. After this we wandered around in the woods for about 40 minutes, occasionally glimpsing a mark, and made our way to the second beer stop in a “wonderful” “little” valley near Gersweilerhof. Most of the pack enjoyed the nearly 10 stories of stairs down the valley and up again. The pictures in the event page are truly magnificent and well worth looking at.
Eventually we found our way to the ON IN and Lego started circle. After a series of misadventures involving poor career choices, poor trail decisions, and worst of all-wearing a skirt instead of a kilt-Shiggy in My Shitter was made to do up to and including a Flying Towering Deadbug, with Double Dickhead and Just Sebastian administering.
Good times were had by all. On-on to the next trail! -SQ
Sembach Turkey Trot, 25 November. Be there!
Sembach 12 Down Downs, 8 December. BE THERE!
WHEN: 22 Sep 2017 @ 1900 (7pm for wanks)
WHERE: Danziger Straße 22, 67685 Weilerbach, Deutschland
BRING: $5 or 5 Euro for hash cash and warm clothes, virgins, and your thirst for beer!!!
SPECIAL INSTRUCTIONS: It’s getting DARKER EARLIER, so bring a headlamp or flashlight! Also, I recommend socks – the higher the better.
What: Sembach’s In-N-Out Hash, A-to-A trail
When: 4pm (that’s 16:00) on Saturday, August 12th, 2017
Where: Am Weihertal 6 Waldfischbach-Burgalben 67714
Who: Hares = ALL Sembach MisManagement (ingoing & outgoing)
Why: To fuck off outgoing MisMangement and welcome incoming MisManagement!
On After: POTLUCK on after at Karda-She-Ain’ts place (same as On In). Comment below on what you would like to bring to include side dishes, softies, paper plates, cutlery. Main meat course and WINE provided by host (please help me drink this alcohol before I PCS!)
Crash Space: 4 spots in a bed, 2 spots on a couch, at least 6 spots on air mattresses, much more on floor! Blankets, pillows, sleeping bags available upon request!
Directions: Can get here via A62, B270, or by train (On Start is 2.4 KM from train station)
WHO: Harry Potter
WHEN: Monday, 9 Aug at 1900
WHY: Because it’s a partial lunar eclipse!
Because I like suspense, I’m finally sharing start with you guys! Full Moon Tonight starts at Untere Eisenbahnstrasse 4 66849 LANDSTUHL 49.416544, 7.564935 (The lot area behind the train station!) Bring your moon hats so you don’t get moon burn!!!
WHO: The majestic LEG-O
WHERE: It’s at the lake in Waldmohr! If you don’t know where that is… Then it’s here… 49.386894, 7.353775
WHY: Because it’s a full strawberry moon!
SPECIAL INSTRUCTIONS: It’s a lake! Bring a swim suit or a speedo! Or nothing at all! The on after could be in the water. If there is enough interest we can do a swim hash! Follow trail by following the flour on the lily pads! �
All joking aside. Bring your limber running legs, your freshly waxed belly buttons, your thirst for shitty American beer and your desire to run wild with the full moon! It’s time to let out your inner Remus Lupin and revert to your basic instant, Sharon Stone style.
hareraiser note: whats a lupin
When: 22 April 2017 – This Saturday!!!
WHO: BooBoo and Teacher’s Pet
WHERE: 36 Kuselweg, Erdesbach
WHY: Because it’s Earth Day, and Sembach is celebrating this special event with a CLOTHING SWAP! No, really! I know I’m not the only hasher with a drawer full of old hash shirts that I never plan on wearing again.
BooBoo’s VERY IMPORTANT NOTES:
Please join us for the annual Earth Day hash at Earthbrooke!
22 April 2017 15.00
In the interest of preserving the earth and BooBoo’s sanity, there will be a GREAT Haberdashery give-away/sale/exchange/raffle.
We will start at 15.00 in order to do this before circle and trail. That way, you can wear all the new, old, fashionable and questionable haberdashery you may have acquired, and have a beer or 2 before we set off on to BooBoo’s second to first DEAD SembachHHH trail.
This will be an A to B trail with a bag car, some beer stops, view stops and the circle at B.
Please park at the parking lot by the river (Fischervereinhaus) in Erdesbach (directions) and walk up the Earthbrooke from there.
The address is
We’ll sort out getting back to cars after circle.
Bring : lust for life, money and down parka, gore-tex running shoes, virgins, money, a towel, and your concern for the environment!
Call TP or write to him if you are confused
What: Pink Full Moon Hash
When: Tuesday 11 April at 1900
Where: Mackenbach 49.471455, 7.574466
Trail: A to A
Hare: Takes 3
D’erections: From A6
1. Take exit 14-Kaiserslautern-Einsiedl
2. Head towards East gate of Ramstein
3. Go past the East gate and at the traffic circle take the 1st exit towards weilerbach
4. Go about 2km at the next traffic circle take the 3rd exit towards Mackenbach
5. Stay on the priority road through M’bach
6. As you leave M’bach you will come to another traffic circle, take the 3rd exit towards the woods
7. If you get to Miesenbach turn around and go back
What: Wear something pink to celebrate the full moon. Bring your hash cash, your virgins, flashlights, anti-tick and anti-stinging nettle stuff and your joie de vive.
Why: Cuz Takes 3 has been hashing with Sembach for 7 years!!! And wine the hell not!
Disclaimer: No guarantee the moon will be pink!!!!
What: “Regular” Saturday Hash for those that couldn’t get out of bed and head to Venice for an Awesome weekend of kilt wearing and lifting.
Where: North side of Ramstein Village, RP
Who: You (the aforementioned lazy person too lazy to go have an amazing time in Venice), ALL virgins (because we like them sooooooooooooooooooooooooo much), Visitors (apparently too lazy to go to Venice too), FAIRWEATHER Hashers (you know who you are…), the curious (bi), the Pagans, the Idolitors, etc, etc.
When: (Crucial question I must say) TOMORROW MOTHER FUCKER!!!!!! 8 April, 2017 at 1600hrs.
Why: Well, I cum for the beer, snacks, people touching, hard breathing then calming down for a moment then breathing hard again repeated several times, For the start time, we are on Summer hours baby!! Woot! Woot! Regarding the lateness of the announcement…let’s just say that I tried until the last minute to use my Grand Vizier powers to CREATE a bierfest for us to rub in the faces of those in Venice…and failed. (Or did I?)
How: Like the Greek Freak says in the Kama Sutra about sex in the “kitchen”…”Just Do It” If you need instructions I quote from the aforementioned book, ahem “From the A6 every d’erection, take exit #13 “Ramstein/Landstuhl” and turn North (away from Oscars and the hills). This road is called the L363 or Landstuhler Strasse (here anyway). Drive until you get the big mound in your face and dive straight through into “RAM”stein. Follow the goody trail (or priority road) through “RAM”stein direction Steinwenden. Once the sign says you’ve left “RAM”stein, slow down or you’ll cum too fast and miss the “G” spot, which is the first opening on the Right. Drive it on in there, park it if you must, and shoot your wad until the circle is complete.
If that doesn’t get you there, you need serious help, so call But His Nut and he will be glad to help you from Venice.